RFA Talk > What's That Got to do With An Abstinent Program?
I have been a low maintenance person all my life and then I got in the Food Addiction program. What I mean by low maintenance is that it didn't take me long to get ready for work. I wore my hair in a very short cut. It was a neat cut, but all I had to do was shower, when I showered I would comb it out and go. I wore big clothes all my life and I did wear men's shirts to work also. Then I got into program and things changed. it was suggested that I get pierced ear rings and get my ears pierced. I said that would never happen to me. Now, I didn't say it to my sponsor, but I was thinking to myself what does that have to do with being abstinent. Has I had her as my sponsor I was making the decision that I would follow directions. So I was going to get my ears pierced and it was a big deal. I thought I had to take the day off work to get it done. Then came the manicure and perm. I've never had a manicure or perm in my life. That just wasn't my personality to do that. So I followed directions and went and got a manicure and perm. I even got my hair highlighted. I still couldn't understand what that has to do with me being abstinent. But I did it. Then came the work on what I was going to wear and I had to get rid of my big clothes and the men's shirts, 27 of them to exact. I felt my sponsor was helping me to realize that I am a lady and ladies take care of themselves. I wasn't used to taking care of me; I took care of everyone else. After all isn't that what great co-dependent , control freak does? Then the carrying a purse and that was going to far. I'm 69 years old and have never carried a purse in my life. I'm carrying a purse now. Finally I realized it has a lot to do with the program. It says in Food Addiction: The Body Knows on page 157, "Remember, recovery means progress: going forward, building, learning and healthy change." All my sponsor was doing was encouraging me to have healthy change and that includes all the above and it has a lot to do with an abstinent program.
I have been a low maintenance person all my life and then I got in the Food Addiction program. What I mean by low maintenance is that it didn't take me long to get ready for work. I wore my hair in a very short cut. It was a neat cut, but all I had to do was shower, when I showered I would comb it out and go. I wore big clothes all my life and I did wear men's shirts to work also. Then I got into program and things changed. it was suggested that I get pierced ear rings and get my ears pierced. I said that would never happen to me. Now, I didn't say it to my sponsor, but I was thinking to myself what does that have to do with being abstinent. Has I had her as my sponsor I was making the decision that I would follow directions. So I was going to get my ears pierced and it was a big deal. I thought I had to take the day off work to get it done. Then came the manicure and perm. I've never had a manicure or perm in my life. That just wasn't my personality to do that. So I followed directions and went and got a manicure and perm. I even got my hair highlighted. I still couldn't understand what that has to do with me being abstinent. But I did it. Then came the work on what I was going to wear and I had to get rid of my big clothes and the men's shirts, 27 of them to exact. I felt my sponsor was helping me to realize that I am a lady and ladies take care of themselves. I wasn't used to taking care of me; I took care of everyone else. After all isn't that what great co-dependent , control freak does? Then the carrying a purse and that was going to far. I'm 69 years old and have never carried a purse in my life. I'm carrying a purse now. Finally I realized it has a lot to do with the program. It says in Food Addiction: The Body Knows on page 157, "Remember, recovery means progress: going forward, building, learning and healthy change." All my sponsor was doing was encouraging me to have healthy change and that includes all the above and it has a lot to do with an abstinent program.